I love jogging. Love it! I would go twice a day if I had the time. Ear buds in. Lakes circumnavigated. Very liberating. And just as passionately, I hate going to the gym to lift. Hate it. No matter how many times someone wipes down the machines, it’s still nasty. And every gym smells the same – stale. One of the worst parts of going to the gym is seeing “Gym Guy.” Jim Rome does a great job unpacking who this is:
“Gym Guy!” We all know Gym Guy. You know this cat. He’s the guy who rocks the weightlifting gloves…that he re-velcroes before every big set. Unless he’s truly a purist, and then just goes with chalk. The same guy, who grabs a complete stranger and says, “Yo bro, can I get a quick spot?” only to freak out if you try to spot him or assist him in any way screaming, “I got it. Don’t help me!”
It’s the same guy who when you’re in the middle of a couple of sets, asks if it’s cool if he works in, when he knows it not, and sweats up your machine. And if you tell him no, you’ve got a couple sets left, he’ll just set up shop five feet away and just stare at you until you’re done, muttering under his breath about how bad your form is. And the second you’re done, he stomps over and adjusts the weight as quickly as possible making sure you know how much stronger he is than you. Gym Guy grunts like he’s passing a kidney stone and loudly drops dumbells on the floor after his dumbell press so everyone knows he’s “the guy” using 120 pounders.
Gym Guy also loads his 60 megabyte iPod with Godsmack and Megadeath. And has different playlists for different workouts. The “pecs” playlist. And “delt” playlist. And trust me, they all rock…hard! And Gym Guy isn’t there to work out. He’s there to work! This is a job to him. In fact, he doesn’t even call it working out. To him, it’s training. Oh, and Gym Guy also double-fists his beverage…a gallon sized jug of water, chased by a bottle of “Carbo-Force” energy drink that he sips between sets. And, of course, he records each of his sets in a tattered notebook. Can’t slack, sucker!
So next time you are at the Y, look out for Gym Guy. And stay away.